Bio-Baiting: When Authenticity Gets Replaced by Performance

Let’s talk about a sneaky trend that’s affecting real connection—even in long-term relationships.

It’s called bio-baiting. Originally a term from the online dating world, it refers to someone faking interests or values in their profile to seem more attractive. But it doesn’t stop with dating apps.

Bio-baiting can show up in committed relationships, too. You act a certain way to avoid conflict… you say you’re “fine” when you’re not… or you stay silent when something really matters to you. It’s all performance, not presence.

And while it might seem like you’re “keeping the peace,” you’re actually eroding emotional intimacy.

Are You Still Performing in Your Relationship?

• Do you say what your partner wants to hear instead of your truth?

• Are you agreeing to things just to avoid rocking the boat?

• Do you find yourself hiding parts of yourself that feel “too much”?

These are subtle forms of self-abandonment. And they create a false relationship built on image, not intimacy.

Real Love Starts with Real You

Let me be real with you: If you’re editing yourself to be loved, you’re never going to feel fully safe. Real love can only grow when the real you shows up consistently.

That means you get to unlearn people-pleasing. You get to challenge the story that you’re “too emotional,” “too needy,” or “too intense.” You get to believe that your truth is worthy of love.

🛑 Stop bio-baiting your way through your own life.

💭 Ask yourself: What part of me am I hiding in this relationship—and why?

If it feels scary to show up honestly, that’s okay. But let’s not mistake avoidance for alignment.

❤️‍🔥 If you're done performing and ready to feel seen, supported, and safe—join my Patreon for exclusive coaching content, community Q&As, and behind-the-scenes podcast access. 👉 patreon.com/ValeryMolone

Much Love,

Valery Molone

https://www.coachvalerymolone.com/